The crates are going up! I know right, I walked past the station yesterday morning with a Monday blurry eye and perked right up at the fact that Boxpark is finally on it’s way. Let’s not mention the fact that I thought it was due to happen last summer. It’s finally coming!
And why are we all so bloody excited. Well I’ll tell you why.
- Err, for starters it is actually going makes us cool as fuck. Croydon is finally going to be on the map – and not for high crime rates, riots or people that still think wearing Adidas tracksuits on the street is OK. Side step the obvious gentrification and just wallow in people no longer backing away when you say you live in Croydon. Finally.
- The influx of bearded men is going to sky rocket. And for the women of Croydon this is an exciting bloody time. Because it’s a known fact that temporary structures that house ‘pop-up’ shops and restaurants are a hot bed for hot men with hot beards. The number is doubled when said structure is made from crates. Don’t ask me – it’s science ok. It’s bloody science.
- MEATLIQUOR yo! Yes, you heard me right. Meat fricking Liquor is coming to Croydon. And hopefully for at least 6 hours nobody will really realise so we won’t have to queue up for 17 weeks like we do in the West End. Get that burger in my face immediately.
- Our Uber bill is going to fall through the floor. Because the novelty of having this here will run until at least Christmas. Which means all us commuters will just come home on a Friday night at a normal time, and hang out with the rest of the hipsters and be able TO WALK HOME. Ok, worst way we’re going to have to hop on a tram. But still. HELLO CONVENIENCE.
- The Breakfast Club. Because, you know what I don’t mind lining up for an hour for a full english if I go there in my PJ’s. Making me get dressed to schlep to Soho on a Saturday morning to line up for sausages was never going to happen. But now, I’m all over that shit. Can you imagine the brunch dates. Behave.
- The Cronx. Oh yeah….apparently now we’ve got our own craft beer company because we are just all of the snazzy. And they’re going to have a bottle shop & bar that serves grilled sandwiches. Incase you’re looking for me between now and March – that’s probably where I’ll be.
- There’s going to be other places to go on a date night other than Bugattis in South Croydon. I know right. The boys of Croydon Tinder behold and get to know that you can know suggest somewhere else for date 3. Phew.
- We won’t have to make arrangements ever again. Long gone will be the days of ‘so if we catch the 19.45 from West Croydon, we’ll be in Shoreditch for 20.30, can stay for a few hours and catch the last Overground because we live in the sticks and are skint. Hello to days of ‘hello mate, see you in like 5 minutes, let’s go for Fish, Wing & Ting’. Wahoo.
- Wine & Deli. If you live in Croydon then you’ve got to have been living under a rock to have missed Brgr & Beer in Matthews Yard. Well the geniuses behind that have come up with yet another hold-the-motherf*ckin-phone plan. Wine & Deli. Yes. Wine and small plates.Literally. Cannot. Even.
See you there kids