I’ve got a funny thing with certain words. They just proper wind me up. Sitting watching Titanic on Sunday night, someone on the screen uttered the word ‘melancholy’. My flatmate & I agreed that it is on the list of the most stupidly annoyingly words in the world and she went so far to ask if it could make a feature in my next blog.
So, Sarah. Here’s to you. And your hate of the word ‘melancholy’.
13 of The Words That Annoy Me The Most.
Quinoa – not only should it be spelt keenwaaa, it also should be pronounced ‘so basically, what you mean is that this salad isn’t going to fill me up?’
– to all Siobahn’s out there I apologise…but really?! The spelling of your name makes you sound like a German railway service. Sio Bahn like Deuche Bahn. Spell it Savaughn. Then we all know where we stand.
Sian – That’s another one that gets my goat. I don’t even know where to start with spelling that better. Just call yourself Alice or something simple.
Phlegm – don’t try parade round like you are a fancy word for a fancy action with your silent ph. Wind your neck in.
Corrupted – when used in the context of a computer. Did my Word Document do a small country out of $5billion? No, course it didn’t. It’s just having a mental 5 minutes. Relax.
Gusset – that section of a ladies undergarments need never be discussed and as such doesn’t need a word. Leave. It. Out.
Melancholy – just hold your hands up and say you’ve got the fucking hump.
Mauve – what are you, lilac or purple? Mauve. Behave yourself.
Kenya – when pronounce Keenya. Oh have you just holidayed in Keeeennyyaaaa? How nice for you and your middle class drawl.
Chillax – made a word decision. Stick to it.
Hilar – totes hilar was it? It’s not a hard word to finish. Make an effort.
Suppository– the mere utterance of this instantly makes my bum cheeks clench.
Gentrification – basically a word to let me know that another place in South London has had every decent chicken shop taken out of it. Should be replaced with the word ‘poncy’.
Knob: ‘Wow, hasn’t Brixton become gentrified. So many quirky places to eat and a pint is only £8.50, bargain really’
Me: ‘Blimey, Brixton got poncy. I can’t afford to live here’